[MeowsePad]

I just started a community a few weeks ago, and I'm already feeling that I don't want to run a forum anymore. I'm on the verge of tears as I'm writing this. It's so hard to invest so much time and effort daily into something like this, and there are always so many problems that come up and there are no perfect solutions. It's hard, and I just feel like it's taking a toll on my mental and emotional state to keep doing this. I want to shut the forum down, I think, but I don't want people to be angry with me for wasting their time. And I really do like keeping in contact with the members of my forum. It's just so hard. Please tell me what to do.

[naruto100]

Are you running paid to post forum like this?

Well, handling all these alone must be handle. I guess you should talk about it right on forum. I hope users will understand the problem.

[MeowsePad]

It's not a paid to post forum like this, no. It's just a simple community-type forum. I'm just an easily stressed out person, I guess, when it comes to things like this.

[Fergal]

It's so hard to invest so much time and effort daily into something like this, and there are always so many problems that come up

Maybe there are things you can do, to make running the forum easier. What tasks are taking up so much of your time? What types of problems do you have to deal with?

[suny]

I know what you mean as I have visited your forum a few months before. You feel disappointed in some particular situations but I can assure you that you will be able to come out of that kind of situation only if you tackle the issues with little more strongly. After all that is your form and you are the one who calls the shot.

[MeowsePad]

It's so hard to invest so much time and effort daily into something like this, and there are always so many problems that come up

Maybe there are things you can do, to make running the forum easier. What tasks are taking up so much of your time? What types of problems do you have to deal with?

I don't even have a good answer to those questions. I guess it's just that I get obsessed with projects like these, and considering the fact that my free time will decrease immensely soon, I just don't know if it's good for me to run a forum right now.

[naruto100]

my free time will decrease immensely soon

Well, without free time I guess it will be more difficult for you to continue with your blog. And also without admin attention site can go in any direction. So yes it is difficult situation for you.

About decision making, I guess I have no idea about it. And also there are many other people here who knows better than me about handling this situation. So I would love hear them.

[Sam]

You've clearly put a lot of hard work into your community, which has had some fantastic success (over 5,000 posts in a few week! )!! You should be extremely proud of what you have achieved thus far. We both seemingly have very different forum management styles: of the 5000 + posts on hostBB, I have 116 whereas you have 1869. You've burned yourself out trying to kickstart the community and keep activity going. I took a laid back, long-term approach, because I don't think I'll ever be able to achieve overnight success. But- it's still frustrating. And sometimes I wonder whether I give hostBB and QneedA enough attention.

A suggestion: ban yourself. Give yourself a temporary ban for a week. Let members know you will be taking that time away from the forum. Don't worry about activity levels, promotion and any other problems. Your community can survive a week without you (in fact I once read about a forum that hadn't even been opened by the owner who went away on military? service for a month or two. They came back and found a vibrant active community).

If you really do feel you absolutely cannot continue running the forum, pass the baton onto someone else. Perhaps you may get some return for the amount of time you've put in. As well as that, by selling, you still get to be a part of the community and can maintain those connections.

Good luck MeowsePad, you're an excellent administrator / community leader!

[sherryinutah]

I just started a community a few weeks ago, and I'm already feeling that I don't want to run a forum anymore. I'm on the verge of tears as I'm writing this. It's so hard to invest so much time and effort daily into something like this, and there are always so many problems that come up and there are no perfect solutions. It's hard, and I just feel like it's taking a toll on my mental and emotional state to keep doing this. I want to shut the forum down, I think, but I don't want people to be angry with me for wasting their time. And I really do like keeping in contact with the members of my forum. It's just so hard. Please tell me what to do.

Happiness is important. Do you have anyone helping you manage your forum? Can you delegate the tasks that are stressing you out?

I'm hypersensitive too. A few years ago I cleared everything out of my life that was "bringing me down". Do whatever you need to so you can feel some inner peace. Spend your time doing things you enjoy. Don't allow yourself to worry about what the members of your forum think.

Remember this: If you do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life. ~ Marc Anthony

Sleep on it and follow your heart.

[darrensurrey]

How on earth do you get so many people in such a short time?

[blair]

You had started something that most people could only dream of doing. Maybe, the process is too much to handle but you should be glad that you had been there and people like me could only imagine how it would be on your shoes.

Cheer up. you are just getting started with your way to success. I agree you should take a break then come back whenever you feel like it. Good luck.

[Decentlady]

First of all congratulations! For such a pretty and vibrant community on the forum. I am a member there. You are only a human and stress can take its toll on anyone. No need to break down. Go take a break and come back to us when you are calmer. Days go by, and this depressive time will also vanish even before you realise! Happy relaxing!

[DreekLass]

It's not a paid to post forum like this, no. It's just a simple community-type forum. I'm just an easily stressed out person, I guess, when it comes to things like this.

I'm sorry to hear about this. I have never run my own forum before, but I watched Ken start up TFW and saw all of the headaches that he experienced. Have you thought about outsourcing some of the things that you don't want to deal with to others?

[CyberFreak]

Running a forum is a hard thing to do. I don't think it is bad to have moments where you think it is too much. I think everybody feels this way. It is easy to just close down/sell a site because of the way it sometimes make you feel but typically you probably will regret it.

As other have said, don't do it alone. You know alot of talented people when it comes to running forums. Fall back on them and get some help. Even if they can only do one or two things here and there or offer advise, it is still a bit less on your mind and a bit less for your to do.

Forums are difficult because they attract a number of people who spend alot of time on the site and all contribute in some way. It is not like a simple html site or a blog where you can just put something up, people will read it and then move on until you next post something. The activity of a forum is very visible, the admins activity is visible and there is alot to read, moderate and reply to. Due to the openness of a forum, arguments happen and there is an open way for users to show their dissatisfaction about decisions or changes which can be demoralising in itself. Forums are quite unique in these ways and do cause alot of stress and take up a massive chunk of time.

My advice from my experience would be don't rush into a decision and don't try and take your forum too seriously. Let your forum grow naturally and see where it end up. You don't need to reply to everything and you do need to promote it everywhere. Let it grow slower and if need be, let it be a small community with just your friends. A successful forum is not a big forum. Success can be measured in many ways. It is like personal success in real life is not down to who has the most expensive car or most money. Trying to be too big too fast or trying to do too much in a short space of time will get your down.

I took FP too seriously, tried to do too much, got too involved with everything and wanted what was very hard to achieve and combined with the day to day stresses of running a forum, I got burnt out many times and felt like you do. I did change after leaving FP and before starting with FC with Fergal and I think I am better for it. I prioritise my real life over my online life. I do other things online other than FC and especially if I feel myself getting fed up or stressed. The old me probably would have got FC beyond where it is now but I probably wouldn't be here now because of it. It is like the race between the hare and the tortoise. Sometimes "slow" triumphs.

If you really do feel you absolutely cannot continue running the forum, pass the baton onto someone else. Perhaps you may get some return for the amount of time you've put in. As well as that, by selling, you still get to be a part of the community and can maintain those connections.

I actually think differently from this. Personally if I put alot of work in to a site but couldn't continue with it, I would close it down and not sell it. If I could go back to when I sold FP, I would have closed it down. If you see the site you care about in the future in bad shape and are powerless to help (no matter how willing you are to help), it typically will make you feel alot worse than the benefit of the small amount of money you would get for selling a smallish forum.

[oldbuddy]

Continuing to have an interest in anything you sell is a personality trait, not a common flaw. I sold a domain name last January and the person that bought it has done absolutely nothing with it. Sure some of my old friends may have gone there and found the site down and wondered what happened, but when I cashed the check I let it go. I have other things to concern myself with now, so why should I let the past haunt me?

I would offer it for sale to your members and see if anyone steps forward. If you do sell it, cut the cord and move on. Just my opinion.

[MeowsePad]

Thank you so much for the messages, guys. I'm feeling slightly better about things today. I hope that this continues. I will keep in mind all that you guys have said. Thanks.

I think I am just trying to do too much. I will try to pull back a little bit.

[chikitta]

When you started this forum you were very optimistic that it will work and you were also aware that it will not be easy because anything good never comes easy don't give up now just give yourself sometime and breathe you will get better ideas don't let frustrations way you down just believe in yourself and all shall be well all the best.

[naruto100]

Thank you so much for the messages, guys. I'm feeling slightly better about things today. I hope that this continues. I will keep in mind all that you guys have said. Thanks.

I think I am just trying to do too much. I will try to pull back a little bit.

Great to hear positive words from you. Glad to hear that you will continue on it for now. And also if you feel alone then you should get help for your forum. I am sure that will relieve some pressure.

[shamzblueworld]

Do not shut it down at once, maybe stop promoting it and do not invite people, you can announce on the forum that you will be closing it soon or set a future date and announce it, maybe in a month or two. And then see how the members react, maybe they convince you to keep it going and help you in process, or if they don't. They'll not blame you for shutting it down.

[thisnthat]

It really does sound like burn out. Perhaps you can delegate some stuff and get a moderator or two to help you out. Or, maybe you just need a break. I hope it all works out for you.