[Abigael]

Grammar is important. Commas save lives, as in this example: "Let's eat grandpa." vs "Let's eat, grandpa."

[GuestHu]

I was working on my quantum physics homework when my mom came barging in ...
I switched to porn because it was easier to explain.

[Tendz]

Q: Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team?
A: Because she ran away from the ball.

[Abigael]

"Dammit I'm mad" is spelled the same way backwards. Think about it.

[Tendz]

What does an air conditioner have in common with a computer? They both lose efficiency as soon as you open windows.

[Abigael]

Words can only hurt you if you try to read them. Don't play their game.

[Tendz]

Q: What did the cross-eyed teacher say?
A: I can't control my pupils!

[anil02]

Do you remember the day we travelled in a car?
I put my dog out of the window,
You put your face out,
Then people started shouting
‘TWINS TWINS’

[Tendz]

Q: Why are vampires so easy to fool?
A: Because they are suckers.

[Abigael]

I have been reading some funny twitter posts and this is among the best.

[anil02]

Your network tariff has changed!
Call charges are now calculated
according to brain size.
The smaller the cheaper!
Congrats You can make free calls!

[Tendz]

Q. what do you call a bear with no teeth
A. A gummy bear

[GuestHu]

What does a Karen do when they get mad at a computer?


They demand to see the task-manager!

[anil02]

When somebody who is deeply
in Love with you tells that
You are
cute, beautiful, & angelic, talented
I agree. That’s true,
Believe me, I swear because love is definitely blind

[Tendz]

Q: Why didn't the sailors play cards?
A: Because the captain was on the deck.

[anil02]

A pizza and an apple were thrown down from the 15th floor.
Which will reach down first?
.
.
Ans:The Pizza,as it's fast food!

[Abigael]

Why don’t Calculus majors throw house parties?
Because you should never drink and derive.

[Tendz]

Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a movie called The Search for One-eye Jimmy and nine months later she gave birth to her baby. Another lady says, "Oh, I saw the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and then nine months later I had septuplets." The last lady gasps and exclaims, "Oh no, I just watched 101 Dalmations!"

[Abigael]

Since the coronavirus outbreak, my 47-year-old son has been washing his hands religiously. In fact, he said, “I’ve been washing my hands so much, I found the answers to an old eighth-grade math quiz.

[anil02]

Once a Sardar, his wife, son and daughter went to a private party. There he introduces his family to a stranger by saying, ‘I am Sardar, she is Sardarni, he is my kid and she is my kidney.’